More sex than on Pornhub and more deaths than in Total Recall: that's the Bible for you. The book that tells us the story about a vengeful God that destroys entire cities, puts his believers into tight sports with complicated proofs of faith (just ask Abraham), and condemns his enemies to suffer for the entire eternity. Well, that's at least what the Old Testament is all about because the New Testament is much cooler with a Jesus Christ that dies and revives just like Terminator.
Well, here you have it, the holy book of Christianity in its Android app version, with everything you need to become a faithful Christian and get ready for the Apocalypse, leaving aside your sinner life so you don't burn in hell for centuries and centuries.
The Holy Scriptures on your Android
This isn't the official Bible published by the Vatican but by some really loyal followers. In any case, we have to admit that the Church is getting more and more modern. No abortion, no women rights, no condemnation against child sexual abuse on behalf of its members, no birth control methods, no condemnation against dictatorial governments... but at least they've now got an Android app to prove that we're in the 21st century. That's state-of-the-art for you.
If you don't download this app, you'll run the risk of burning in hell.
So forget about your old printed version and download this APK right now to carry around the Word of the Lord on your phone and keep up with all its latest news and trends thanks to these functions and features:
- Select the interface's language, choosing between over 40 available.
- Choose between hundreds of different versions including the King James Version KJV or the Revised Standard Version RSV.
- Download the texts to read them offline, without an Internet connection.
- Texts in audio format so you can listen to Holy Scriptures while you do other things.
- Reading plans just in case you fancy a thematic approach.
- Search for keywords in the text.
- Share verses with your friends through social networks, email, instant messaging and chat apps... you'll earn yourself a few blocks on WhatsApp.
- Add bookmarks to chapters and notes.
- Create a free account to view all your notes, bookmarks, reading plans...
- Possibility to download a version of the Bible for kids to keep them away from drugs, Internet porn, and going out at night which is definitely very satanic.
Well, if you like getting up early on Sundays to go to mass, this is definitely the application you need on your Android smartphone or tablet. Or even better, on both.